Angry Post For No Reason, Need More Caffine
I guess, I have early case of senile dementia on its own discrete ways, I am getting senile, and I am getting demented, put together ‘Senile Dementia.’ There I go. These days, nothing gets done, I started this book—Vernon God Little about a month back, and I am still in page 26. It’s not that I read first 26 pages in the first day, and I picked the book after a month and started reading where I left off. In fact, I have been reading that freaking book every night to my bed. Then I realized, I read the same page in different nights. I don’t know where is my freaking book mark? I lost it while moving, and I always forget to buy one, while I am at the book store hence—senile dementia. Senile: always forgetful, always running to restroom (loose prostrate gland, I guess, wasn’t I supposed to get that when I get really really old), demented: always testy, always ready to spew out curse words at anyone anytime. But in retrospect, I guzzle almost a gallon of coffee at my work in eight hours, I guess, that makes me run to the restroom often and always cranky, there is a layer of soot of caffeine in my veins. Only consolation and reassurance that I haven’t got senile is: I am always horny, well can’t say anything about demented, I guess that’s become my personality. Where was I? See! I proved my point, I have an attention deficiency. I can’t remember what I said (wrote) a few minutes ago. Ok, let me read my first paragraph. Oh! Yes! About ‘Vernon God Little,’ very interesting book, albeit my sincere effort I have just reached first 26 pages. Then, last night I realized, I am reading from page 15 again. It was a kind of déjà vu (two years of French class in my high school and the only freaking word I can remember, along with how to curse, and some human anatomies) feeling, my sublime sense told me; I have already read that page, I checked if I had put a mark by nipping the edge of the page (remeber I don’t have a bookmark, lost it), then I realized I had 16 of those nippings out of 26 pages, last one being the page 26th. Then, I jumped to page 26, trouble, I had no recollection of any characters–friends, mom, local sheriff, moms friends and whole sleuth of characters, they were popping out in every paragraph with the protagonist—Vernon. I said, ‘shit,’ after a month I managed to read first 26 pages, if I were to start it again, I would never finish it. So, right now, I am of two minds, should I continue the book? If yes, from the beginning or page 26? Or, should I buy an audio version of the book? That way, I don’t have to keep track of pages (I know I am never going to remember to buy a bookmark), and not strain my eyes too. It can work as a lullaby too. Let me do some serious contemplation before I get back to that book. This evening, I was at the book store (no, I didn’t remember to buy a bookmark this time too), and I was going through the shelves. Guess what I came across? How many of you remember a guy name ‘Dale Carnegie’ and his book called ‘How to make friends and influence people,’ or some shit like that. If you ever thought, your PR is awful, and you needed to improve it, the mantra was Dale Carnegie then when I was a teen, and I thought, wow, this guy is the ultimate guru of PR. In retrospect, the book was full of clichés, and some half ass supposed to be inspiring stories of personal transformation of some great American figures, I can’t remember if all were Americans, but pretty much sure all were pale asses white people. All these fucking, self help, inspiring gurus should be burnt alive for their pretension and dishonesty. Beginning with that nautanki dhoti—Deepak Chopra following with Oprah, and that fucking bald dick with a Texan ascent—Dr. Phill. ‘How to make friends and influence people,’ I don’t understand, why do you need to make friend of everyone that you meet in life. Some people are dick, and loathing them gives a purpose to your existence. For god sake, why do I need to influence anybody else for what? To begin with I haven’t been able to influence myself. Fucking quacks.
Anger Management ma admit huney ho? Alright, just kidding!
I have been through the situation where it took me months to finish a book. Everytime I sat down, either I ended up on the same page or I completely lost track of characters which eventually led me to ground zero and had to start over again.
Neat art of expressions, again loved reading it!
“why do I need to influence anybody else for what? To begin with I haven’t been able to influence myself. Fucking quacks” ….. haha … beautiful …
page 26 is quite a feat, ive had the picture of dorian grey on my bed for months now, havent gotten past page 3, and same deal, cant remember who the characters are …. thought id get all philosophical with the “sold my soul” crap … bunch of horse-shit …. so much for my trying to become all elite ….. not in me …. i am all for continuing my current life style … rotting away on the couch flipping channels on the idiot box watching all the pretty dumb fucks in a house fucking each other in all different permutations and combinations, and crying over it the next morning… shut the fuck up, you have a place to live, food to eat, liquor to drink and all the fuck you can get .. you are already luckier than most people in the world ….
or i could try reading “how to make friends and influence people” …. try to put the theory into practice by going to a bar, drink enough to have “beer goggles” on, try finding someone with the same, lure her with the “sweet talking” i learnt from the book and hope my damn thing still works after all these years …..
nah ….. i think ill just rot on the couch pretending im reading picture of dorain gray, or midnight children … or … some other of those intellectual good-for-nothing crap ….
isnt life grand ….
-haha .. an angry comment for an angry post ….
*gols dai, feel free to delete this if deemed inappropriate.
Am back to catch up your all the posts that I missed.
YOU GIVE ME TRIP, GOLS! Intellectual dose, indeed! You may not agree nevertheless.
A colourful nice read.
(now on i wont give my url. YOu know that AKISMET always takes me for spam.)
Its always fun reading and knowing what golay is thinking.
My advise is…. socialize more and do something about your hotness, its frying your fuckin brain and your genitals.
Say BAHHHHHHHHHHHH!
say baaahhhhhhh!!!! hehehehehe!
hi c***al
may i contact you/
or go “serenity now!!” like in seinfeld
(serenity now and explode later… LOL)
that comes with a finer print tho
they got book for everything..maybe you should write one just for kicks
Last night I was at work and I was furious for no reason; I was eating some french fries and this chef come to me saying “Eating cold fries, not good for health” and I replied “I have no freaking time to eat hot ones!” Later realized he was being nice to me and still I didn’t felt any guilt; maybe insanity had prevailed.Sometimes you just feel like beating crap of everyone around without reason and I thought I was only one feeling so from time to time.
I always wonder how these so called guru lived their own lives and write book as such!! No wonder writer of “How to be a millionaire” would be a bankrupt beggar.
For god sake, why do I need to influence anybody else for what? To begin with I haven’t been able to influence myself. Fucking quacks.
Exact my sentiments and I couldn’t have expressed it in better words!!
It is always a nice read from you!! Keep writing!!..
Dang!! all my comments gone..:S
Anyways just wanted to say its nice read!!..
have you ever read robin sharma? the author of something like ‘the monk who sold his ferrari’?
Some months ago somebody gifted me a book by Sharma. I forgot the name of it. Not that monk/ferrari however. But it’s on increasing/improving PR sort of whatsis–personal experiences/punditry of the management guru.
I thought of finishing it
(Because I asked for some birthday gift>>> a girl friend she was… not girlfriend >>> my first birthday gift that too from a girl)
Went through some pages. But always jumped to other chapters…It’s been more than six months but I haven’t completed it.
Monotony aside, lack of patience may have ruled.
Your ‘rants’ [you prefer saying rant, but I would like to say "booster dose" (sic)] are better than that book in glazed paper.
I don’t know why I read you. What is more, how do I garner patience to read you?
May be for an anrachist within me, you are a mentor.
YOU ARE BUT AWESOME GOLS.
—————————————
F**k. f**K THEM ALL (I donno who.)
WHY THE FUCK i HAVE BEEN FAN OF YOU GOLS? I bet if you publish a book–no matter it can be a collection of your blogs–it will be sold like a hot cake.
Fk fk fk
Fuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuckkkkk
*****fan of yours, gols
Grace
So, the practice is universal–not finshing the book.
Pakhe
delete your comment? why? in fact a nice read. beside we don’t need to make sense everytime. and i hope you make better use of your couch–copulating.
Vashek
Intellectual dose? Then, I am been successful at my pretension.
Baber
Come down in weekend, and have my ‘Veja Fry.’
Twaaks
hehe…the goat that i am…
check this out
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Satyr
hence the booka
Juggy
Sometime, anger is good for purging. But, don’t do it often.
KayKay
I have heard about that book, but not read it. Good to find a reader of my RANT who reciprocate in the same vibe.
All great men think alike.
Beware
But fools seldom differ.
We might be in the foolish bunch.
oh! i missed to acknowledge few commentors..
aeutikt
serenity is serendipity for me, once in a while i bump into it, mostly while i am sleeping, rest of my conscious time i am pretty much exploding
rambo
i guess, you have mistaken me for someone else, since you have addressed me as hi c***al
, i am not that person whoever you think of me.
regarding contacting me, i insist respectfully, let’s keep our relation anonymous, but, if you have any urgent/pressing matter, i have no reservation against giving you my email.
thanks anyway.
S,
that was for Twaaks, not you.
my, my. sure you can contact me in that case Rambo. Send me an email or give me call.
Ooouchh! a jab at my ego.
lau!
had i got your contact number or address, why would i write here….anyways
aba paradaina :))))
true, true, but you could always try getting hold of me at chhauri….
okies
but that blogspot doesn’t asks for any email address.
CS, my challenge, find me out who I am without resorting to gols.
gols, it will be unethical if you help him hai…:P:P:P:P:):):):
Everyone asks with me, why blog? I would like to tell them to read this post. why blog?
by the way, still angry?