Basanti Our Guide

Have you ever wondered, why, we South Asians don’t speak Spanish but English? You would never believe; the answer is— GPS. Yes, Global Positioning System, I know, you are thinking, Golay has gone nuts, but my friend, don’t be haste to judge, until you hear my theory.

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Theory begins:

Everyone is aware of the history book —divine comedy, accidental discovery of America by Christopher Columbus in 1492. He set out to find a safer sea route to India to by pass the marauding Mongols of the Silk Route. Miraculously, his ship Santa Maria under the divine misguided providence landed up in the shores of America, sailing under the erroneous map, charted by cartographer under the only premise that the earth is round.  

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Ignorance is bliss, but in this case, comic for Spaniards and tragic-comic for natives, which landed them in the American shore.  Spaniards must have laughed their ass off to their luck, when ventured inland to find semi clad natives, devoid of any spices (the original plan of sailing to India), but found gold and silver in tons, followed by conquistadors massacring the natives in millions and proselytizing the rest into Christianity.

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Irony! The ship named after Mother Mary—an epitome of life and love, brought death and destruction to Incas and the Aztecs. Sometimes, someone else’s misfortune turns blessing for you. Today, our names are Ravi, Ram, Laxmi etc. not Jose, Maria, Gonzalez, and we speak English instead of Spanish, just because Columbus didn’t have GPS. Had he have the instrument, he would have landed dead right on Bombay’s or Calcutta’s shore.

There, I rest my theory.

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Now, you must be wondering, why this psycho-babble with no context, whatsoever? Because. I fell in love with this nifty little thing called GPS–a technological wonder.  We borrowed from a friend to drive around in California—the unknown territory. On how it works.

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For a person like me, who gets lost often in his own backyard, it’s the perfect face saver—no embarrassment of getting lost and calling the host several times for direction that you are visiting, and always reaching late for the dinner.

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It’s no bigger than calculator, equipped with Windows OS and smart software, embellished with chirpy feminine voice to instruct you, where to go, with the visual aid of the major highways and insignificant gullies too that have been ever built and digitally mapped.

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The lady inside the GPS suggests you lovingly and patiently what do next, unlike your wife or girlfriend always at your throat while you are driving, and go berserk when you take a wrong turn or speed. It’s a gentle reminder to women kind how they ought to behave while men are driving.

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After few days together, it’s not the GPS itself, it was the lady inside it, I fell for. She would make a perfect match, who would never fail you, and always deliver you to the final destination. If I knew her address, I would ask my mom to go with my rista, I guess, I need to write to Microsoft Corp. to tell me on her where about.

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Soon, it will be: Behind every successful man, there is a woman (who is inside GPS). *So, ladies beware, there is a serious contender, get your acts together, behave yourself in the running vehicle before you find your man having sex with GPS.

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We lovingly named her—Basanti as in movie Sholay, who would guide our Dhanno the rented car.

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Time does change fast, and technology and science does wonders. Who would have thought a metal box swirling in the sky would guide you on the ground to the precision of few feet? But, no matter what, there is a beauty in getting lost and discovering the places and meeting the people otherwise you would never get to see in your life.

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Technology can be hell of a convenience, but sometimes it kills your intuition.  

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A Beautiful Poem »